Sleep Deprivation's Hidden Charms

 I was looking through my journal and came upon an entry that was a good reminder for me. So, I thought I would post it here also.

"It has been four weeks since Haddon's birth -four blessed, but long and hard weeks. 

I have never slept so little or felt so depleted and faint. My spiritual weaknesses have never been so apparent to me. My sin is glaring. Yet, I know I have never been so richly blessed as I am now. 

I am looking at John 15 and it is quickly becoming one of my favorite passages of scripture. It starts with a statement of fact. Jesus is the vine and His Father is the vinedresser - truth to base my life on, a foundation. Second comes a hard pill to swallow, unpleasant medicine that yields great results. If you bear fruit, you can be sure that there will be pruning. It is a painful process in a believer's life - the cutting off of dead branches. But, it reveals a spot for new life to blossom.

I am aware now of many dead branches in my life that need to be cut off to make room for good fruit.  I am selfish - there is nothing like a screaming, hungry baby to awaken that realization. No, you cannot go to the bathroom. No, you cannot get a drink now.

I am impatient. My pride is being stripped away. It is hard to be proud of my actions and performance  when sleep deprivation knocks down the walls of deception and reveals my nakedness within. I am repeatedly brought to the awareness that my own strength is nonexistent. I could go on, but...in the midst of pain there is relief. Verse three - 'Already you are clean because of the Word I have spoken to you.' What blessed words of relief! I don't have to grow my own fruit. I don't have to make myself clean! It has been done. Thank you sweet Jesus.

Now what? Verse four - 'Abide in Me and I in you.' Five sums it up for me. No matter the situation, the solution is always he same. Abide inChrist. Apart from Him I can do nothing. But with Him, the possibilities are endless - I will bear much fruit. 

Philippians 4:13

I can do all things through Him who strengthens me."